Behind every high-performing leadership team is a foundation of difficult conversations. Not just about numbers or strategy, but about the real tensions that shape how people show up. Yet in many senior teams, those conversations never happen. Instead, leaders settle into a rhythm of surface-level harmony, hoping things will resolve themselves.

They don’t.

Through leadership coaching and advisory work with executive teams, one pattern keeps appearing: teams are avoiding the conversations that could unlock their next level. Not because they’re lazy or apathetic, but because they’re uncertain how to begin without creating conflict.

There are three conversations most senior teams consistently avoid:

  1. Role clarity and accountability. When responsibilities overlap or drift, tasks fall through the cracks and frustration builds. Without clear ownership, productivity drops and blame culture creeps in.

  2. Strategic disagreement. Teams often nod in meetings, only to express their real views privately. This creates political undercurrents and erodes trust. Productive conflict is a sign of health. Coaching helps teams disagree well.

  3. Behaviour and values alignment. When behaviours slip or values are quietly violated, leaders often hesitate to call it out. But tolerated misalignment slowly sets the tone for the entire culture.

In both therapy and coaching, we learn that what is unspoken often becomes the most powerful force in the room. In senior teams, avoidance turns into passive-aggression, overworking, and decisions made through backchannels.

The goal is not to eliminate tension. It is to use it wisely. Leadership coaching offers practical tools to make these conversations safer and more constructive. Frameworks for feedback. Questions that encourage curiosity, not defensiveness. Practices that support psychological safety.

These conversations are not about conflict. They are about clarity, trust, and growth.

If your team feels polite but stuck, it is time to look at what is not being said. Great strategy means nothing without relational alignment at the top. Senior leaders must be willing to challenge, coach, and be coached. That is where real leadership begins.

And that is what builds a culture that scales.